Don’t Trip dude!
What is the 10 MINUTE TACTICAL TOOLBOX ?
Sure, running up a staircase doesn’t sound cool like blasting down a door with a shotgun or jumping through windows. But it is an essential skill that any prepared guy should have in their Tactical Toolbox.
Most people probably think they can run up a staircase just fine, but its not so easy when going balls-to-the-wall fast, holding something in your hand, scanning your environment, wearing a bunch of gear, wile under stress, making decisions, paying attention to someone and not looking at your feet.
Way, way back in the day I was chasing a dude up a flight of stairs in the projects. I kept looking down at my feet because I was concerned about tripping (and it is just a natural habit most people do). As I was running full blast after this fool I turned the stairwell corner wile staring at my feet and was welcomed by a Davis 32. auto in my face.
Now besides being angry that I was about to be killed by a chromed-out pimp gun that costs 30 bucks, I was extremely pissed at myself for making such a huge mistake. Luckily for me the kid didn’t have in him to shoot me in the face, so after changing my underwear I worked up a training program I jokingly call “Tactical Stairmaster”.
Before I get into this training program I need to get the “you should already know this shit but I have to say it anyway” stuff out of the way. Check with you Dr to make sure you won’t have a stroke wile doing this, train with someone that can catch you if you trip, and wear some sort of protective padding.
This program is extremely dangerous, the following article is for educational and entertainment uses. By clicking the link below you agree to THIS
Tactical Stairmaster 101
You will need the following items:
- A Brain
- Stairs with railing
- A training buddy
- Protective Padding (especially shin pads, forearm guards, knee pads and a helmet)
- Scotch tape or 550 cord
- Poster board
- 5 pound dumbbell
- Basketball Training Goggles (Dribble Master brand only costs 5 bucks)
- Holster and training sidearm (Airsoft guns are great for this)
Put on your protective gear and the Basketball Training Goggles, the training goggles basically block your lower vision. Now (wile holding the railing) go up and down the stairs at 40% speed for 10 minutes a day.
Sounds easy right? Well, by the end of this week you will be cursing my name. Don’t even think about doing this without a helmet, training partner and the other protective gear.
Now that you are sore as hell and nicely bruised up go ahead and boost your speed to 80% for 10 minutes a day.
Day 1 and 2 of W3: While going at 80% speed hold the 5 pound dumbbell in your hand, alternating between your strong and weak hand for 10 minutes.
Day 3 and 4 of W3: Have your training buddy write up some simple addition math problems on the poster board (no peaking). Then have him hang them up (with the tape or 550) at each stairwell corner on your training stairwell (using a different set each time you go up).
Wile you are running up or down (still at 80% speed) holding the 5 pound dumbbell (still alternating between your strong and weak) you have to call out the answer to each math problem before you reach the next stairwell corner.
Day 5, 6 and 7 of W3: Wile you are running up or down (still at 80% speed), draw your training gun right before you reach the top of each set of stairs and aim it at the math problem then holster it (all this wile running), then call out the answer to each math problem before you reach the next stairwell corner.
You will need to find a closed off stairwell for day 5, 6 and 7 of W3 so you wont get shot by a cop because they got a call about some crazy guy running up and down a stairwell yelling random numbers and waving a gun around.
If you cant find a closed off stairwell then put a bucket under the math poster board and put a bunch of ping-pong balls in your pocket – draw the ping-pong ball and throw it in the bucket. You will still look like a crazy person but not like a crazy person that a cop would shoot first (think Mel Gibson crazy).
Do the same daily exercises you did for week 3 – but at 100% of your maxim speed.
As I said before please use a training buddy for safety and protective gear or you could seriously injure or kill yourself. Read THIS again before starting this training program, by using this website you absolve DVM of any liability if you injure or kill yourself.
Try and keep a hand touching the railing or wall, like the Secret Service keeps their fingertips on the Presidents car you will use their railings and wall to guide your directions. Also if you trip you will have something to hold onto.
So, now you can Shoot and Loot wile running full blast up and down the stairs. Even if you are not working in an occupation where you chase armed dudes up a flight of stairs this is still a great skill to have. An active shooter situation is an excellent example where the ‘Average Joe’ having this skill in their Tactical Toolbox could save their life.
I can actually run up a stairwell full blast blindfolded, its is one of my stupid human tricks. I tried to get on letterman like 80 times but they never responded to my inquires, so I watch Leno now.
Founder – Editor in Chief
James G is a Veteran Civilian Contractor who has worked in the Middle East and Southeast Asia for way too long. He spends his off time in Indonesia and Virginia getting drunk, shooting guns, writing poorly written articles and running up flights of stairs blindfolded.