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OLD SCHOOL MAN: The “Man to Man Talk”

Walt telling it how it is – man to man

Last week I was talking with an old buddy of mine, I’ve known him from way back in the day when we were in high school. And in our 20’s we both lived in the D.C. area at the same time, back then he was a squared-away dude – cash in his pocket, bunch of gals calling him and a nice future in finance ahead of him.

Well over the past 7 years he has managed to make just about every stupid ass mistake one could make: Bad financial decisions, poor choices in women, fucking-up his career to the point of no return and borrowing money from everyone and their mother. Basically if there was something in his life that was good he fucked it up in spades.

Now I understand that some people just fall on hard times at no fault of their own – but my buddy’s misfortune is 100% self inflected. Every bad thing that has happened to him is a result of him not using common sense or listening to his friends. All of this could have been avoided if he just took his pride and put it in his pocket along with simply not doing stupid shit.

And like I said, this guy is a great dude, a total stand-up brother who used to be a really sharp arrow with a great future lined up for him. At one time I considered him to be one of the few people that I could rely on always as a loyal OSM friend. One of those buddies you could call up at 3AM and ask for help no questions asked.

Anyway – When he called me up a week ago asking for another loan I decided for his own good that I should have a “Man to Man Talk” with him.

So I laid into him and read him the riot act – I basically told him that he was a fuck-up now, that he went from being a pimp-ass Jr. Executive with a fat bank account and gals lined up at his door to a straight up fucking looser. And it was his entire fault because he is now stupid or something.

And if he didn’t start listening to his friends and gain some of his own fucking common sense he was going to end up one of those friends that people stop returning calls from because you know there loser-ass was going to ask for a loan that they were never going to pay back.

Now I didn’t say this to be mean – but he is a man so I didn’t feel the need to baby him anymore. Actually I felt it would be more of an insult to him if I talked to him like he was a pussy or something.

Well I guess he didn’t feel that way because he took it all wrong and got his panties in a wad about it. I was like “you want me to talk to you like one of those insecure cubicle slave douchebags we used to make fun of? You are a grown-ass man, if you want me to talk to you like a sensitive 12 year old girl then fuck bro, you are talking to the wrong fucking friend.”

“I am the only guy from our old crew that is willing to give you a man to man like this – everyone else is just being quiet while you flush your life down the shitter. Seeing you this way straight-up makes me embarrassed for you – we used to be mad pimps together back in the dot-com days picking up models at embassy parties in D.C. and drinking Cristal in clubs. Now you are 36 and flat ass broke and one unemployment check from living on the streets – get your fucking shit together bro.”

After that he really lost it and went off on a rant about how “I” changed and how I owed him blah, blah, blah… and hung up. Well dude, sorry for talking to you like a man, my bad.

RIP to the “Man to Man Talk” in America…

I have actually been seeing this pattern with many “men” these days; they can’t take any sort of advice or criticism without getting all fucking insecure about it. I always have to watch the way I talk to some of my buddies because if you actually tell them your honest opinion they get all insulted and shit.

It seems like talking straight-up and honest to another man these days is the male equivalent to telling a woman that her ass really does look fat as fuck in those jeans.

I think this is a combination of so many men growing up with a single mom, the general Pussifacation of men by the media and political correctness and the fact that so many men have never had a job where they get their hands dirty.

One of the biggest influences in my life was my Old School grandfather who was a WWII vet [volunteered] who used to always give it to people “Straight-Up”. Think Walt Kowalski but more pimp.

If I was fucking up in school he would say “Stop fucking up in school boy” – not “how are you feeling about school”. If someone was acting like an ass in a restaurant cursing around kids he would get up and go over to their table and say “Stop acting like an ass cursing around women and children boy”.

I also remember the way he would talk to his friends, always honest and never sugar coated. If he had something to say to another man he would just say it to them, he didn’t have to think how to phrase it in a way that would not hurt another man’s feelings or something fruity like that.

If one of his friends or another man in the family was fucking up or annoying him he would tell them they were stupid and point to the door. That was just the way he was, an Old School Man that would never insult his male friends by talking to them like a girl.

But these days if you dare say the truth to some men they act like you insulted their mom or something. We have somehow devolved into this “sensitive man” society where it is somehow rude to pull a buddy to the side for a man to man talk.

I honestly think if all men would bring back to the tradition of the Man to Man Talk you would see a 90% reduction in men repeatedly fucking up their lives.


~James G
Founder – Editor in Chief

James G is a Veteran Civilian Contractor who has worked in the Middle East and Southeast Asia for way too long; he has traveled to over 50 countries chasing fortune and glory. He spends his off time in Indonesia and Virginia getting drunk, shooting guns, writing poorly written articles and telling it how it is. James G. on FACEBOOK


  1. Fuck the sensitive man. It’s cool to be there for your woman and shit, but if you can’t take a straight up come to Jesus talk, lord knows how many of those I got in scouts, than you can fucking go work with the hippies down the street. Oh wait, they don’t work. 😀

    Kinda like spanking kids. I got spanked for some of the dumbest reasons and I turned out just fine. Fucking pansies.

  2. Great article for the comeback of OSM. I have given a couple of those kind of talks and thankfully received only one while I was in University, from an old grizzled marine that set me straight.

    These types of talks are near extinct, if you said anything like what you said to 90% of the guys in their 20’s or younger they would probably piss their pants. Or try to sue you for giving them mental anguish or some wussy crap like that. I miss the days when you could just pull a guy off to the side and just give him a talk and maybe a backhand across the mouth and that was all that would be needed to set them straight. I fear we are becoming a wussified gender gentlemen. It is a sad state of affairs.

  3. Its the truth brutha and as its been said for ages. Truth hurts. It hurts as it causes us to take a good look at ourselves and if you dont like what you see, then retaliate with anger. Its “The Sissification of America” and it is in full sensitive swing…

  4. I sometimes feel like I’m the only one in my circle of friends that has adapted the Old-School way. It’s fucking pathetic sometimes.

    Infact, Mr. Grey I need some advice. I have a friend down the road from me, been buddies for ages. He went away overseas to do some work, hard work – good for him. He came back not too long ago and ever since he’s been a complete fuck-up. No job, no interests, no desire to get a life. He’s growing pot in his backyard to make a buck, not doing honest work. Quite frankly I want to kick his ass for being such a dipshit. Do you reckon a OSM talk with him would be the best course of action to put him back into fucking line?


    • You can have a Man to Man with him but be warned, he will ether take it to heart and thank you or you will never talk to him again

      ~James G

  5. James

    you speak the truth and not many men can take it any more. I had a friend that was in about the same shape as yours, he never asked me for cash but he would call me 4 times a day to tell me how great he was.

    I had enough and replied one day grow the fuck up dude, you are fat and out of shape so the stories of being one of the greatest in sports is getting old and by the way get a job. Support your wife or she will throw your ass out. He told me to go to hell since I wasn’t a real friend.

    Now I get no calls from this looser, sometimes you got to talk like a real man.

  6. Dang straight, bro!

  7. Great article.

    I guess I’ve never realized it, but I do find myself trying to phrase things in a way that would not piss a guy off. James, you are absolutely right that this impulse to “soften it up” is a straight-out insult to the guy’s manhood.

    And lets hear a round of applause for the OSM WW2 Veteran Grandfather. Mine were very much like yours.

    Far too many people these days are simply “males,” not men.

  8. It’s called living in denial, and far too many men in this world do it. Bunch of pansies… Keep telling it as it is, dude!

    Personally, I think it’s time to bring back the Spartan way of raising kids. That should counteract the PK-sissification bullshit going on in this shitty world.

  9. Outfuckingstanding!!!!! I operate with a group of men that still talk to each other “Man to Man”, and I love it. Our favorite saying is….Dig that sand out of your vagina, pull your panties up and get it right! Good article!

  10. Agree with it whole heartedly.

    I have to say though: over the phone?
    Would have to say it is more manly to address these problems with your friend face to face.
    This gives him less of a chance to be a pussy and simply hang up as well as just being more straight up than talking down a phone line.

    • I would have preferred to do that Face to Face – but I am in Iraq so the phone was the next best thing

      ~James G

  11. I miss these OSM articles. Make my day. So did the picture of Walt. I wonder if your friend just hung up out of being all defensive. That kind of directness hopefully pounded the message deep inside and it will fester around in there. Sometimes I’ve reacted in a similar manner but the message was in there and I’d learn it, coming back later and saying “yep, you were right bro.”

    • I don’t know dude, I hope it made him think laong and hard at his life – If he wants to get his shit together and is willing to listen and take action on my advice than I am here for him – if not, well he is a grown ass man so good luck

      ~James G

  12. Hey James I loved your article and couldn’t agree with you more. I’m an Old soldier, Physician Assistant and a self made man, I was however raised by my single mom because my Father was not man enough to own up to his responsibility.

    My mother was a Cuban immigrant to this country and worked 2 jobs and went to night school to learn a trade. She taught me to take responsibility for what I do good or bad. She taught me loyalty, honor and integrity. I am proud to be my mothers son and feel I am no worse the wear for not having a father around. Keep up the great articles.

    PS my mom was tough as nails and always told me what she thought without mincing words. I think you should always say it as it is. Only way to talk, say whats on your mind. Stop acting like a pussy and get over your pussy self!!

  13. Went through the same thing with my best friend that I grew up with. We partied like rock stars in high school and college. After college we both started careers and his went to shit while I continued to focus on my future. I eventually got married and had a kid. He was in my wedding and acted like a dick the entire time like I owed him something for being successful and settling down with a nice lady. When I had a kid he never called to congratulate me. I said fuck him and moved on. He’s still out blowing money and raising hell. I’ve always been OK with raising hell but you have to wish the best for your friends and be there for them. He never had my best wishes in mind when I tried to grow into a successful adult. Good riddance to that fuck. I wish him the best and hopefully he grows out of it. If so then I am there for him.

  14. I dont know if anyone else here watches the Alaska Gold Rush show on Discovery channel; but that Dorssey guy is a prime example, IMO, of the pussification of America. His fellow miners have tried over and over to have man to man talks with him, each with the result of him getting butt-hurt and going off whinning.

    Good riddence he left the show.

  15. Great article. I have one of those friends. I’ve had enough. He called me for a loan around Christmas…I took the avoidance approach. When I get back home he’s gett’n an OSM talk. If he gives me any whiny shit, I’m gonna tell ’em to rub some vagisil on it.

  16. Ryan, you have spoken my favorite…..”Fucking Panzys” is right.

  17. Outstanding and long overdue … Fwd fwd fwd buddy …..

  18. A great article! I ave a friend that we were tight for years, then he got wrapped up with this whacko wench and they had a kid, he was 50 at the time. She fucked him over, but, he kept the boy. Now, eight years later he’s lost the shop he owned, his house is one step from foreclosure, he’s borrowed money from everybody and bitches about he can’t find a job that pays ‘enough’. Twice I stopped short of the man to man talk, and I know it’s a matter of time before it happens. The WTF is just unreal, the guy is a great martial artist and a super mechanic, but, he’s let the bitch fuck his brain up. It’s time!

  19. ~sniff sniff~ Sorry man, I’m all teared up after reading this one! It was fucking beautiful. Sniff

  20. With respect to the Man to Man Talk, true Old School Man knows and applies the adage:

    You should know a man seven years before you stir his fire.

    There are other variations with the same point. Man to Man talks are essential, but as the pussification becomes complete in this world, so too does the loss of old school knowledge. Particularly the fine points.

  21. Good points in the article. I’m happy to have read it. I agree that giving people in general straight talk nowadays shocks the fuck out of them. People collectivley are used to a lot of tap dancing or utter freaking out when it comes to communication. I think a lot of the in between is gone.
    So, we can learn a lot from the old school about using your head when you talk to someone or when you’re listening.

    • It’s a pleasure to find such raatiniloty in an answer. Welcome to the debate.

  22. Devils Advocate here, but I don’t think any man likes getting a lecture and having someone else (even their closest friends/family) pointing out all their flaws and failures. Someone getting defensive after that kind of talk is something I would expect from most people, even if they knew it was all true. How they react and adapt to it in the future is another story.

    That’s just my 2cents.

  23. Have a female boss who told me of an employee of her’s contracting on helicopter maintenance in Iraq. Couldn’t wake up in the morning, couldn’t be on time, couldn’t do the job properly, generally a royal PITA (Pain In The Ass). Then he got mad cause SHE, as the boss, gave him the OSM talk! when his feelings were hurt, he didn’t even have the balls to call her anything vulgar, instead telling her she was “a female dog in heat!” Her answer? “You don’t even have the balls (manhood?) to call me a ‘slut bitch.’ You’re pathetic.” The crew then gave everyone “Indian” names. Hers was “Female Dog In Heat.” His was “Dances With Head Up Ass.”

    You’re right, though – DEAD ON. My last job was rife w/PC and finger-pointing. Went into a meeting and was told that I had screwed up. I promptly answered, “You’re right, and it’ll be fixed by this time tomorrow.” Dead silence. No one had ever had the guts to take responsibility and they had no clue how to react to it. THAT was at a national guard aviation facility. Scary.

  24. Justin: I think you miss the point of such a man-to-man discussion. It is not meant to catalog all the wrongs just to rub salt and sand into a raw wound. Sure, if the recipient hasnt a clue of how bad things are, how many bridges were burnt and how dire the situation is, then you have to rub his nose in it a bit. But either way, the point is to tell the dude to get their shit together. Point out to them that they had it all tight at ome point in the past and can do it again. And tell em that they have no future with your relationship of things don’t improve.

    I had to give one of these to a lifelong bud whom went astray after hooking up with the wrong woman. Sat back and watched him go down a hole, take on the victim’s worldview (“everyone’s out to get me”, “the world owes me”) and crap on every longstanding relationship he ever had, dudes and family. We had the chat but it was unavoidable for me to make him appreciate that his woman was the catalyst for his decline. It did not end well and I never heard from him again. From playground pals to strangers and it hurt.

    My friend went too far down e whole and his woman poisoned a good soul. He was probably beyond recovery at that point but I had to go for it. Sadly, when it is time to give such speeches or advice, there are only three outcomes: status quo, changed for the better or, complete anger and estrangement. So, if you are faced wight such a situation, use it but be mindful that it ould be the end of tht relationship as several of the commenters have noticed.

    In the touchy-feely world, they would do it as a group of concerned friends, family and clergy/professional and call it an intervention. Such things can be effective and not unlike a man-to-man. Te one advantage to a group is the recipient is hearing it from everyone they know and can’t single you out for being a douchebag, not liking his woman, etc. Maybe that argues for an Old School group intervention of the guys bros, assuming you are not the only one left.

    James, I Stumbled Upon your site a while back and have enjoyed your newest and older posts. I am, and always have been, a civilian but your pragmatic and no bs approach to your writing and reviews is welcome. You have helped me reevaluate my family’s “just in case preps” and the like. Thanks!

  25. Here in Sushiland, I have to wade through a sea of male genitalia sporting she-bitches everyday. Thousands of them. God forbid you man-check any of them and it’s a rare thing indeed to see even the tiniest semblance of man in their little doe eyes. James, you da man. A Pimp among pimps, but I gotta say, I’ve seen a coin toss on the single mom raised thing. Some guys pussify and some don’t. I was raised by a single mom, but also had the benefit of having old skool men around in my life. I hung around manly men, had gruff old grandpas on both sides of the family and generally grew up idolizing the guys that shot straight and didn’t mince words or shy away from calling a dunce a dunce. Good on you for telling your buddy straight up what was going on. Thats no easy thing to do!

  26. Great article to read ! And True from the beginning to the end…

    I’ve tried to have some man to man talk with my younger brother ( I’m 23 and he’s 15 ), my parents have pussified him in a manner you wouldn’t imagine. Constantly crying and bitching about shit like a little 8 years old girl. He just can’t stand a man to man talk without loosing his nerve and reacting like and insecure douchebag, behavior that my parents seem to encourage… ( Wich is odd because they didn’t raise me like that. ).

    So yeah, the man to man talk is on the verge of extinction…

    I do not consider myself an old school man, not worthy of that title yet…

    But today just being honest and true with your friends has become a difficult thing…
    People usually go right on ” Avoid ” mode, they try to change the subject, they don’t look you in the eye, they just can’t stand the fact that you’re introducing them to themselves in the most true manner in order to help them because you consider that : that’s what friends DO !

    It’s a lonely world for people who have values and are not sissies…


  27. And James, you did bring up something I have to expand upon. Just finished my 31 1/2 year program to finish my BA in Dec09. I had to do a paper and stumbled across the subject by accident: Children raised by single parents are 30 TIMES (not percent) more likely to end up in jail. It cuts across national, cultural, monetary, racial and sexual lines. Find a person in the pen who had 2 parents, there are 30 who had only 1. Men, women, black, white, oriental, hispanic, rich, poor, American, British, Botswanan, it doesn’t matter. I am still stunned by the fact.

    • That’s a quiti-wkcted answer to a difficult question

  28. This article speaks volumes of truth… I had this problem a few weeks ago while I was home on leave. Every time I come home my buddy needs money, or needs help finding a job through one of my contacts or family members… I gave him a man-to-man talk and he couldn’t take it… Pussified. I’ll always love him to death and be there for him to an extent, even if he’s acting a dirt bag, but I won’t baby his ass any loner.

  29. Devils Advocate here, but I don’t think any man likes getting a lecture and having someone else (even their closest friends/family) pointing out all their flaws and failures. Someone getting defensive after that kind of talk is something I would expect from most people, even if they knew it was all true. How they react and adapt to it in the future is another story.That’s just my 2cents.  

    Boy, if a man can’t take an in the face lecture about the how, when, where, and what he’s fucking up, then he just needs to cut his fucking nuts off and live as a complete eunuch, because thats what he is. I’ve been on the receiving end of the OSM talk before, and I thank God that one of my friends gave a shit enough to do it. It probably saved my life.

  30. I think ‘DVM newbie’ said it best, to use the M2M talk wisely because there are only a few outcomes when its time read the riot act.

    This is a great topic though, I am not an ‘old school man’ yet but I do value honesty and being able to deal with truths. I have also noticed alot of sugar-coating, avoidance and smack-talk attitude from my peer group, not shit I like to partake in. But that’s why I dig DVM discussions.

  31. Great article . I appreciate you had the stones to do the man talk to your pal. I agree pussification of the american male is sickening. I’m 36 (not ancient at all) but i remember when if a guy gave “his word” it was solid. You looked a guy in the eye when you shook hands . and yes occasionally you had to check your friends and tell them they are being flat out stupid. and yeah your friends would understand. Hell its hard to find friends who will stick by you in a divorce let alone through the ups and downs of being a red blooded american male who stands for something .

  32. Yep. Those were the old days. Only 20 yrs ago I could have that talk with any of my friends. Now, it’s Dr. Phil BULLSHIT!!!!

  33. This needs shared on Facebook and spread the hell around and deseminated to the masses.

    • how about we make a halter top with a glogoey eye on the front of it as big as your head? and then we can maybe just wear techni-color bell bottoms, and tie dye crochet HOODED sweater/duster things. all with white blond hair. ok? cool.

  34. I like your definition of a real OSM friend, James. My cousin Tyler took it a step further and said, “A true friend is someone you could call at 3 am to ask for help burying some bodies. And they’d do it, no questions asked.”

  35. Pussy men are here to stay for the forseeable future so my response tends to be a slow ramp up to brutal honesty. Talked a buddy thru the end of his 30 year marriage. He was on the verge of a nervous breakdown so I just pointed out obvious facts, gave him some hope and started with the odd shot of brutal honesty. Took a month but by the end I was telling him how he’d fucked up and not to be such an asshole in the future. He’s still a bit of an asshole but much less of a fuck up. Best part is the he is now used to me drinking his single malt scotch whenever I visit, no whining at all.

  36. James you have hit the nail on its head and indeed very hard!. This is not just an excellent piece of advise but a timely reminder on how we should live! Keep em comin Mr Pimp Supreme!

  37. Great article and I dig what you’re saying. However, here’s the thing:
    A lot of guys these days who are fuck-ups…maybe they really want to stay that way. Fuck…some guys like that would tell you to fuck off and never want to talk to you again because they got busted letting themselves go like that. I get the feeling it’s not because they’re turning into losers as much as you telling them that they are losers when in their own mind, they don’t think that they are.

    As far as I’m concerned, if I gotta have a talk like that with a motherfucker, then it will be our last damn talk as friends. It’s happened and fuck it, you let it go because you get sick of seeing a guy turn out that way. What’s worse is the feeling that you think hanging around with fucks like that will somehow rub of on YOU. I don’t want that.

  38. Knife Hand! You gotta use the knife hand for man-to-man talks!

    Just wanted to lighten a pretty heavy subject. My own experience is that if you have a man-to-man, sometimes it has to go wall-to-wall and after that, you’re almost obligated to be there to help rebuild the guy.

  39. PogueMahone hits it on the head, though several have said it. Undertaking a brutally honest, WTF, come to Jesus discussion is an investment that you can not abandon. If the situation requires a relationship jeopardizing frank all out, you have invested in it and own it. Coming to a bro, listing his issues and then walking away is all about your power and ego, not about helping the dude. If you tear him down, you have to be there the build him back up and hold his hand whole he does it. As they say in the china shoplift you break it you own it. Tat works with ashtrays, countries and friends. We can all rant about puss fixation, but the better part of valor is doing the right thing and seeing it through to the end. Otherwise, walk away.

    • Well said. If you have to blast a brother, you’d better be there to help rebuild him in the shape of an Old School Man.

  40. we call those a “come to god ” meeting.

    my wife calls me and my friends the biggest assholes she ever met,i try to explain to her were not assholes were throw backs from a time when men acted men.we all had older uncles or father figures that refused to raise touchy feely cry babies..they talked to us when we listened and they hit us when we didnt ..they tought us the lessons we needed to know if we wanted to learn them or not.

    i believe my age group 36-30 were the first men targeted with that bullshit that men should connect with their emotions,and it was ok for men to anything else they went overboard to the point that being a mans man now =asshole or a caveman mentality and its a god damned shame….my daughter who is only 9 (has only been exposed to old school typ men) will point out a new aged man and say daddy look its a girlie man..

  41. Both my wives have accused me of being “emotionally un-available” and they (including my current girlfriend) said that I and un willing to connect emotionally blah blah blah… I don’t fuckin know cuz there was a game on but the point is, maybe they should have hooked up with one of these little turd burglars to begin with! I don’t just marry every chic that I bang obviously. I usually date someone for quite a while before I make the commitment to split up what little retirement I have left. They have plenty of time to see who I am and that I’m not magically going to begin picking up my socks, putting the lid down, buying flowers or coming home at night. I’m not that kinda guy who can even fake it! I think I just need a mail order flip every five years or so, maybe that would be the ticket!

  42. I don’t think it’s so much a “pussification” as it is a “fear of litigation” in many cases. The world became lawyer-slinging-neurotic-brain-cases and everyone just kinda shrugged and accepted it. Now, you say something too harshly and you could lose your job, or worse, get your ass sued to oblivion and back.

    I can’t walk up to a co-worker that is fucking up constantly and lay it out for him. I’ve done so once and nearly got my ass suspended. Sure, I might be right (Hell, I might even be wrong). But being honest these days, when people are none-the-happier to sic their legal team one you, is dangerous.

    But in the case of talking M2M with friends, it just needs to be done. The real friends will be mad at you, but will understand. It might take days, it might take years, but the real friends, the ones that know you’re right and were the only one to help them by giving them the goods, they’ll get it. That’s when you need to help them get their shit together. Don’t give em fish, give em a bazooka and teach em how to catch a thousand fish. 😉

  43. I remember working in a factory some years ago, i messed up an order and sent it to the wrong place. When i told my boss i did it, the woman supervisor (with which i was a couple at that time) asked me “why in the hell you said you did it fool? ” and i was what? that was the man thing to do, not hide behind others and look the other way. I didn’t like the people i worked with (and i could let them take the blame) but a man has to be responsible for his acts. Same thing with a woman friend, running for city council, i was the only one to say to her “i like you but can’t vote you for ideological reasons, i’m not going to fool you saying i will like others do”, she didn’t take it well, looked at me in a strange way for some time after that.

  44. My eldest boy came out with the “I hate school” thing (he just started High school at 11) I said
    What’s to like Boy? Life is a stone to sharpen our steel.

    end of conversation

    • Hey, coldharvest

      How’s it been? Anything cool happening lately at the BFC? I stopped showing up so much. It seems that all anyone does anymore is post news clippings and insult each other. I miss the good conversation/debate.

      Hope all’s well.

      – Lost Boy

  45. Good job, James.

    Nice one, coldharvest.

    It’s up to us to stop this ridiculousness or in 2 more generations, we’ll all be chicks.

    I don’t want to get off on a tangent here but I just started as a Den leader this year in Scouts. Man, it sickens me to see how even in this organization, we’re hell-bent on breeding sensitive boys, rather than true men capable of leading other men.

    I was born too late. I should have been in the Victorian age, where you got your ass beat at boarding school until you finished and went off to lead an expedition through the Brazilian jungle, where almost everyone died and you suffered in silence, pulling the maggots out of your sores at night.

    On second thought…maybe that’s a little much, but you get my drift :)

    • Hear, hear.

      When I was in Boy Scouts, we still had to go through initiation rites and whatnot. Pussification was punished, discouraged, and ultimately corrected through proper ridicule. We were held to a standard which was not lowered to accomodate weaklings who refused to put forth the proper effort. Boys in my troop were taught by our scoutmaster (a retired, tough-as-nails CHP officer) to become proper men. It is now no longer PC to tell someone that they are acting like a bitchy little teenage girl. Even if it’s the honest truth, you’ll probably still get sued/fired/expelled/ostracized/arrested/etc.

      I agree with just about everyone here. We shouldn’t allow the castration and emasculation of men to continue in our society. If you’re a good friend, you’ll have the guts to tell a buddy the truth to his face, no matter how it hurts his ‘feelings.’

  46. I got the “Man to Man Talk” early in my career, when a grizzled old vet of my profession sat me down and said, in so many words, “Stop getting your ass kicked. This world is full of predators and they are in search of prey. Decide right now to Man Up and refuse to be their prey.”

    I’ve also seen “the talk” blow a pussy-man out of the water. He wanted coddling and sensitivity, but got the blast from a real man, and refused to receive it with respect, and as a sign of honor.

    Damn it, it’s an honor to have somebody who respects and cares enough about me to give it to me straight!

  47. Ok, just found this site and this little piece of heaven. I’m a Nam vet, ex-cop, former private security agent, and once wore a major bike club patch. I’m lucky in that my wife likes me just the way I am, my kids not only got the “M2M’ talk but took it to heart ( 2 girls and 1 boy). I’m mid-60’s, still ride without a helmet (or windshield, faring, and saddle bags), both us love a day at the range. Let’s face it, there are some “old school women” out there. You just gotta be lucky to find one.
    James, you ever stop by the Big Island on your way anywhere, the beer’s are on me.

  48. too many metrosexual males out the dawg.


  49. I gave my daughter and my son that talk every day. And when they whined, I told them to suck it up. Luckily my wife KNOW see’s that it’s better to be with a man then a sissy.

    I’ve lived by a simple motto.
    I will always say it to your face.
    You need to hear it , and I want to see your expression

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